Bazza

"Ever since my wife left me, all I've been eating is meat 'n beans"

- Bazza

Bazza is the main character in the Bazzaverse. He is a man who was born and raised in in Port Adelaide, residing in the same house and visiting the same pub, The Port Admiral Hotel until recently, when it was done up too nicely. He still visits, but only to stand on the opposite side of the road and glare while drinking his own alcohol.

Early life
As a young boy, Bazza's favourite food has always been meat. He has never been spotted eating a vegetable or piece of fruit before, simply refusing to. He finished Primary School, then left High School early to live a life of sitting on the front porch yelling at those brave enough to make eye contact with him.

Other than home and the front porch, Bazza's most visited spot is the local pub.

Family
Bazza has always lived in the same house in Port Adelaide, never having worked and marrying his wife Susan young, resulting in two unplanned pregnancies of Stacy and Bryce until Susan divorced him due to his habits and personality. Despite this, he hasn't changed, and still continues to live his life eating meat and beans as its the only thing he can cook, occasionally being fed higher quality meat or beans by his friend Kyle, a used car salesman who is only after him sexually, or his daughter Stacy when she takes pity on him and visits from Sydney.

Despite his daughters care, he refuses to admit her existence - as a woman whom he can't sexualise. His son, on the other hand, he disowned due to him not watching football - which in Bazza's mind deems him as gay. He is quite fixated on this fact. Alongside this, his son Bryce eats a variety of vegetables and fruit, and international cuisines, which he also deems to be homosexual behavior.

Personality
Bazza is an awful, awful man. He is sexist, racist, homophobic and doesn't hesitate to let everyone know about this. He is fiercely stubborn too, never once changing his diet of baked beans and meat, considering all and any other food groups 'a woman's meal' or 'gay'. In reality, he is afraid to try other foods and won't stray from the familiarity of meat and beans.

Like food, Bazza doesn't do a lot of other things for the worry that it might be considered homosexual. Such things are; cleaning (himself or the house), cooking, having emotions or wiping his ass.

Trivia

 * Bazza's favourite things to watch are football, outback truckers, fishing shows and his favourite channel is Seven Mate. He has a strong dislike of the ABC as he believes it's run by homosexual liberal green vegans who are trying to corrupt everyone with the gay agenda.
 * Bazza's favourite brand of food is bloke frozen food.

Audio
My Body is a Machine

Christmas Decorations

Beermas

Imagery


(Bloke Sized Food, Bazza's first choice)